Penny Rowell

ALBUQUERQUE, N.M. (ANS) -- Penny Rowell’s mom was special. Refusing to buckle under difficult circumstances, Patricia’s memory still shines bright toward her mother and her siblings.

Penny recently told me that her mom Patricia wasn’t perfect, but nonetheless she was “just right” for Penny and her family.

Penny said, “I cannot name a holiday or birthday without plenty of food, gifts, and something special to do. And, of course, mother dancing in the kitchen and singing as if she were an opera star, added even more cheer to the holiday.”

And those circumstances? Penny said her mom had “seven kids, one dead father, and a second who had long since made it apparent the job wasn't for him. Mom would work all week, every day of the week, and then she cook and cleaned for us every evening and all weekend long.”

There was more, Penny said. At least once a month the family went to the mountains or the lake. In the evenings they played games or listened to classical music, while mom told them a story she made up.

But Christmas was special, Penny said. Her mom raised the family in the church. They even went in the week, but Penny said it wasn’t pushed on the kids.

She said, “It was as if God was always there, and always would be. The lights, the tree, the gifts, weeks of decorating, cooking, and wrapping. However, the best was the manger. We kids would fight each other for the right to set up the stable under the tree. You see, Mary and Joseph, along with the wise men, had to be set just right as they looked down on Jesus. And the animals needed to set around them, as if the moment was as special to them as it was to us. Then the best part was the angel looking down with the Star of David shining brightly on Jesus.”

However, things changed, Penny said, as the children grew up and went their separate ways. She said there were fights, broken hearts, and even a few lost souls and a brother who died. Alcoholism ravaged the older kids, and drugs the younger ones.

But there was always a constant, Penny said. Mom and Christmas. And there was always the manger under the tree, every year without fail until 1996. That was when it was discovered that mom had stage four cancer. There is no stage five, Penny said.

Penny said her mom was soon in the hospital.

“Doctors had to cut everything out that they could, but that was to give her some time,” Penny said. “She had called me home to help her through this, but I had followed in her footsteps; full time job, single parenthood, teenage daughter with plenty of her own problems. I did go home, but she and I really didn't have that much time left for each other.”

Penny’s Mom Loses Her Faith

One night, Patricia (who had come to know Jesus in 1976) told Penny she had lost her faith and didn’t believe in God anymore.

“I was shocked,” Penny said. “Not my mother, she was the rock! The nurses tried to comfort me with the wisdom that this was just a stage my mother was going through; towards acceptance of what was happening to her and to her eventual death.”

Penny said her mom wanted to die at home, but her brothers wanted her to spend her final days in a hospice.

“The doctors said she wouldn't know the difference anymore, and it made my brothers feel like they were doing something for her,” Penny said. “I was as mad as I could be.”

Penny drove home as quickly as she could. She went up into the attic and rummaged through old junk for hours until she finally found what she was looking for.

It was an old box, long since torn, dirty, and barely in one piece. It was the manger scene they had treasured as kids. Penny said that Joseph didn't have a head anymore, and Jesus was missing an arm. The angel's wings were missing. Everything was dirty and falling apart. You could tell it hadn't seen a Christmas in many years.

Penny said, “Why my mom had kept it when so many newer ones had been bought through the years didn't come to light until that moment.”

However, there was a reason, although Penny didn’t know it yet.

Penny drove back to the hospice. All the family was there except her youngest brother and his family, who were driving in from New Mexico and wouldn't arrive until sometime later that night.

It was a very difficult time, Penny said. Siblings were complaining that all the kids should get home for Christmas, as they wanted the season to be a good memory for them.

Penny agreed, and sent them all home with her daughter. She opted to stay with her mom until her youngest brother arrived.

The Manger

After they left, Penny decorated the room. She set up a little Christmas tree and finally pieced together the little manger with all the old broken figures. Penny, very tired and sleepy, lay down on the floor next to her mom’s bed.

Penny’s brother finally arrived in the early morning hours. Penny asked him to give her a moment alone with her, and said she would then take his kids to see the others so they could enjoy Christmas all together.
When they were alone, Penny whispered in her mom’s ear, “Mom, your last son is here. When you're ready you can go.”

Penny’s Mom Goes to Be with Jesus

Penny said her mom never opened her eyes, but said, “‘Thank you for bringing them here. I see you brought Jesus, too. I'll never be alone again.’ I was shocked, but I didn't say anything more. I left her to spend time with her son.”

The next morning, Penny’s phone rang. It was her youngest brother. “‘She's gone,’ he told me. I said, ‘I know.’ He said, ‘No, you don't understand! She said to tell you thank you for bringing back Christmas,’ and died right then.’ I said again, ‘I know.’”

Penny said that was eleven Christmases ago. “Some good, some bad, but all of them were special because God knew better than me what a gift he had given me. What a gift I have in Him. There really were never that many gifts under the tree, and maybe one on birthdays. That's all that my mother could afford. And yes, with seven kids the food didn't go that far.”

However, to Penny her mom will always be special. “She gave me the most special Christmas gift I could ever have, and that was to know my Lord, all through a manger.”

Penny Comes to Joy Junction and Returns to Jesus

But there were trials ahead for Penny after her mom died. Three years after suffering a bad marriage and a subsequent divorce, she lost everything she had and started to drink

Penny said, “I went from small jobs and paychecks to even smaller apartments.”

She also got a DWI and subsequent probation. Her brother suggested she come to New Mexico to live and get sober.

“I was here a year when I found out a warrant had been issued for my DWI for non-completion of probation,” Penny said. “The judge reinstated my probation so I could complete a (life recovery) program. I couldn’t find one that (met) the criteria except in Albuquerque, which I couldn’t get to from ... Rio Rancho without quitting my job and moving into town.”

Finally, someone at work suggested Penny come to Joy Junction where she continues to live

She said, “I enjoy being closer to God now, and being sober again. I am interacting with the people I live and work with, as I did before my mother’s death.”

Penny, who gave her life to Jesus in 1976, added, “You’re never close enough to God unless you’re with Him every moment of the day. Now I am surrounded with people who praise Him with me.” 

Jeremy Reynalds is a freelance writer and the founder and director of Joy Junction, New Mexico's largest emergency homeless shelter, http://www.joyjunction.org or http://www.christianity.com/joyjunction. He has a master's degree in communication from the University of New Mexico, and a Ph.D. in intercultural education from Biola University in Los Angeles. His newest book is "Homeless in the City: A Call to Service." Additional details about "Homeless" are available at http://www.HomelessBook.com He lives in Albuquerque, New Mexico. For more information contact: Jeremy Reynalds at jeremyreynalds@comcast.net. Tel: (505) 877-6967 or (505) 400-7145. Note: A higher resolution JPEG picture of Jeremy Reynalds is available on request from Dan Wooding at danjuma1@aol.com.